What is the secret to a long term happy relationship ?  loving relationship

 

Nobody has all the answers to making a relationship say happy but below are a few tips that can certainly keep you on the right track.

Courting.  Never stop dating or take your partner for granted. When you agree to marry that person this is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with.   You chose each other for life and that is important.  One of the biggest mistakes people make once they get married is to stop dating.  Don’t get lazy in love.  The precious time alone together is what created the spark make sure you keep the spark by remembering romance in your relationship.

Keep your heart safe. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your partner. Always have that space ready to receive your partner, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.

Continue to fall in love.  We constantly change. You’re not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, life gets busy with commitments and children but remember its always a choice to stay together.  Your partner doesn’t have to stay with you, and if you don’t take care of each others heart, there is an opportunity for someone else to take it away,  its hard to get back what is lost . Always work on the love you have for each other.  Appreciation for each other keeps loving growing.

Always see the best in your partner. Focus on what you love about them. What you focus on expands. If you focus on what bothers you, you will find more things to both you.  Acceptance and compromise are critical in all long term relationships.   When you focus on what you love about each other, you can’t help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the person on the planet to have the partner you have chosen. Complement your partner for the little things as well as the bigger.  Appreciation will always bring you closer.

It’s not your job to change or fix them. Your job is to love, accept and support.  Changing someone other than yourself is fruitless.  If your not happy in the relationship start with you, check your attitude and your expectations.  We are all evolving and changing anyway through life.  Partnership is about support and acceptance with no expectation for the other to become what or who we want them to be.  Let go of expectations and embrace all that they are if you want to build a happy life together.

Take full responsibility for your own emotions and behaviour.  It’s not your parents job to make you happy.   You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your own joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.

Never blame your partner if you get frustrated or angry. They are your emotions, and your own responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of you that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this person because they brought out the best in you.  If the relationship begins to trigger old childhood wounds, seeking help for yourself is the best thing you can do for both of you.   When you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by those old wounds, and you may even wonder why you ever were.

Don’t forget Intimacy keep you love life alive but working on your intimacy, you can still have a great level of excitement in  the bedroom, if you continue to understand the needs of each other.  Spice it up from time to time and make sure you always see them as your lover as well as your best friend.  Working together on new ideas can continue to bring pleasure and excitement into your relationship no matter how long you have been together.

Remember to have fun  Don’t take yourself or life to seriously. Laugh often and make her partner laugh when you can . Laughter makes everything else easier.

Be present Give your partner your time, be fully present and give all of your attention.  Remember how much you treasure the person closest to you. Attention represents care, being there as support when your partner needs you is one of the best way to show you love for the person.

Give your partner space Sometime your partner may need to do things for themselves, by giving them an opportunity to feel their soul the will come back to you more enriched.  Hobbies and interests and are important and they cant always be shared.  By giving space you are saying I trust you and you are showing that you want you partner to be happy.  What more could they ask for.

Communicate Being open and vulnerable in a relationship is very important.  Know that you don’t have to have know the answer, be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes. Be willing to listen even if you are not comfortable with what is being said.  When the subject gets hard, put yourself in your partners shoes and you will find more compassion and understanding.  Problems are easier solved with openness and a willingness to compromise.

Be fully transparent  If you want to have trust in your relationship be willing to share everything .Especially those things you don’t want to share. It takes courage to fully love.  Part of that courage is allowing your partner to know you completely, your darkness as well as your light.

Never stop growing together It doesn’t matter how much you both change  its important to continue to find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards together.

Forgive holding on to anything for too long in a relationship will sore it over time.  We all make mistakes, that’s how we learn and grow.  Anger & resentment will unconsciously eat away at love.  Forgiveness will help heal the hurt.

Commitment All relationships go through ups and down. It takes effort and commitment to make anything grow stronger.  Continuing to invest the greatest commit you have made in your life,  will give you a life time of friendship love and support.  What more can anyone ask for ?

 

 

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If you feeling your relationship could do with some assistance you can call me on 0424 300 678 to book a session. I am always here to help